Colorado actually has more swiped-right schools than any other state, meaning we're either the hottest … or the horniest.
Several Colorado universities found themselves ranked once again at the top of a list … but this time the list was less than academic.
Tinder just released its list of "Most Swiped-Right Schools" in a blog post Wednesday, and it looks like three Colorado schools made the cut. In fact, Colorado has more schools on the list than any other state, meaning we're either the hottest … or the horniest.
Sigh; if only 'bangability' was a viable major.
CU-Boulder ranked fourth for most right-swiped female students, while CSU ranked sixth. Meanwhile, the Air Force Academy in Colorado Springs came in at #5 for most right-swiped males.
Interestingly, the top-swiped males all attended either a prominent religious university or some sort of military academy. Because it's every girl's dream to bone a fighter pilot pastor.
Are these numbers telling of a larger theme? Or are they merely arbitrary? Could it just be that Tinder pairs perfectly with a blunt, a sad, dorm half-boner and a bowl of Cheetos? Or have the right-swipe campus wars only begun, and the least-romantic, hedonistic virtu-lurker era is now only coming to fruition in the Centennial State?
Regardless, apparently the boys in Boulder and Ft. Collins (who didn’t make the list) aren’t pulling their weight. Have you all learned nothing from Jersey Shore? GTL, guys, GTL. Until the bros step their game up and put on something other than blotchy sweatpants and NorthFace stepdad half-zips, maybe the Air Force guys can meet the ladies halfway. A little modern, digital courtship, some B.O.G.O. apps and cocktails at the Tokyo Joe’s off of E-470 before a ‘Netflix and chill’ session? Where do we sign?
The future is bright. The class of 2017 may be facing a terrible job market and a diminishing need for American skilled labor, but The App Store has plenty of right-swiping something-or-others to pass the funemployment.