Rinse it with water for a second, then microwave it for a minute or two. Wait, sorry, that’s bread …

Rinse it with water for a second, then microwave it for a minute or two. Wait, sorry, that’s bread. When it comes to your relationship and staleness, I think the most important thing is to keep up the variety and keep things spontaneous. Settling into patterns and not meeting the standards you had for each other at the beginning of your relationship can make things boring, and predictability is the enemy of boners. So have fun with each other. Do things you love doing together as often as you can, whether that means going out and getting drunk, adopting ferret, or taking weekend trips to ____ (insert acceptable destination here). I’m not judging.

And whenever you can, try things together that you never have before. Here’s why that works to combat staleness and predictability: When you’re presented with variety and excitement, your brain releases a chemical called dopamine, which has a million functions, the most important being happiness, arousal and learning. When your brain free­bases dopamine during exciting activities you do with your partner, you learn to associate your partner with adventure and happiness, and that’s arousing as fuck. This dopamine pathway is activated most easily by doing risky or taboo things together, like wearing sweatpants outside of your house or skydiving … or wearing your sweatpants to go sky diving because you’re probably going to shit yourself. Doing spontaneous, potentially risky things together also teaches you a lot about your partner, and learning new things about a partner is like Viagra for your relationship. If none of that works, try the bread thing.