"My neighbors are once again having noisy sex. You're my only hope: could you ban risqué exercises after 10pm?"
Sweden is that one country all other countries despise because it’s so damn perfect: blonde hair, blue eyes, highest amount of happy individuals, social programs for days and IKEA. Of course, the country does have the highest rate of suicides and the coldest winters known to man but we’ll overlook those shortcomings for the sake of cinnamon rolls.
But there’s another reason why we’re packing up and shipping out to Vikings country: government officials with the same life philosophies as ourselves.
One man, fed up with his neighbors' wild and noisy romps, sent a tweet directly to Health Minister Gabriel Wikstrom asking for help Wednesday.
"My neighbors are once again having noisy sex. You're my only hope: could you ban risqué exercises after 10pm?" the man asked Wikstrom on Twitter.
The reply he received was likely not what he expected.
"Sounds nice for them, I think," Wikstrom tweeted back. "Good for their well being and thus, public health as well," The Local reported.
Most apartment blocks in Sweden ban loud noises after 10 p.m. but loud sex is not one of the bans.
"I wanted to reply in a funny way," Wikstrom told the BBC after his tweet went viral. "Sex is a political matter as well. We often discuss sex in negative terms, like, for example, we relate it to rape, we relate it to sexual abuse … but not to the positive thing that sex really is. I think we should really start to talk about sex as something positive.
"I think Swedes should have all the sex they want to have," Wikstrom went on. "Many Swedes feel they don't have as much sex as they want to because of stress and work-related problems"
And with that motivational advice, we're moving to Sweden…. and most likely moving back when winter freezes over and the sun is out for 24-hours a day.