It's stories like these that really restore your faith in humanity. 

We love a nice heartwarming story, and we've never heard one as good as this. Hopefully they'll make a movie about this someday. 

So the poor bastard Mohammed Abad got his junk ripped off when he was only six years old. Thankfully, hardworking doctors built him a brand-new donger from his forearm, and they even made it eight inches long. Nice. 

Check out how things could go down. He told the Sun:

“When you want a bit of action, you press the ‘on’ button. When you are finished you press another button. It takes seconds. Doctors have told me to keep practicing.”

I mean, he's ready to party. Now, he wants to practice on a real, live woman and lose his V-card. But who would come to his aid? This lady, that's who:

She might just look like a hot, middle-aged real estate agent whose relentless flirting might mistakenly think you've got a chance with her, but she's actually one of the most famous prostitutes in England. 

The altruistic and award-winning sex worker Charlotte Rose has offered to pop Abad's cherry.

Still rocking that "friend's hot mom you fantasize about" vibe, she's ready to face the robot serpent and make a man out of him. The 35-year-old dominatrix has agreed to “get to know each other” over a dinner date in London. Then if things go well, Mohammed will no longer be a 40-year-old virgin.

And if you don't think she's got the credentials for a job like this, you'd be wrong. She won "Sex Worker of the Year" in 2013, because that's apparently a thing. Here she is accepting the trophy:

God bless her. 

Mohammed told the Sun, “I have waited long enough for this — it’ll be a great start to the new year. My penis is working perfectly now so I just want to do it. I’m really excited. I can’t wait for it to finally happen.”

Give 'er hell, Abad. If we can remember anything from losing our virginity, it'll all be over very quickly.