No word on what excuse these men are using, although in our experience "My semen is a ghost!" works pretty well.
For women, it's a cakewalk to fake an orgasm. You moan a little, squirm around, grip his biceps and you're done.
It's a little harder for men. The lack of goopy physical evidence that you had a good time can be concerning to female partners, who often mistakenly measure their worth by their ability to cause fluid to drip out of some guy's urethra.
However, men still fake it, and at alarmingly high rates. A new Canadian study has found that men fake orgasms a whopping 30 percent of the time. And it's not just with vaginal intercourse where men can ostensibly "hide" it by ejaculating inside somebody's vagina; men also fake it during oral, anal and good old fashioned hand-jobs.
No word on what excuse these men are using, although in our experience "My semen is a ghost!" works pretty well.
This is vaguely fascinating given that men have much, much easier time orgasming during partnered sex than women do. So why the Oscar-worthy acting?
Men fake it for many of the same reasons that women do, but according to the research, the reasons differ based on a man's relationship situation.
Single men were more likely to fake an orgasm because of a poor partner selection or a bad sexual experience. Basically, they O-face to just get it over with.
However, men in satisfied relationships most commonly fake it in order to boost their partner's self-esteem. Sometimes, it takes a guy a cubic decade to come, and it's not uncommon for women who aren't familiar with the ins and outs of male arousal to take that personally. Many ladies hold the mistaken belief that marathon fucking means they're not doing something right, or that they're somehow undesirable. Regardless of whether or not this is true, it's often easier for men to just cut the 50-minute sex odyssey and fake it than it is to explain to a woman that she's doing great, really, she just can't make him come for some reason.
Men in relationships also reported feigning climax mainly in order to coincide with their partner's orgasm, so they could experience the fabled phenomenon of mutual orgasm.
And while vaginal sex was the most common scenario to fake it, men also reported faking orgasm during oral sex, anal sex and manual stimulation.
But the weirdest finding of all? Men who faked their orgasms actually reported higher levels of sexual satisfaction.
This is a really interesting finding for a few reasons.
First, it highlights that sex without orgasm can actually be pretty awesome. Too often, couples treat sex as a goal-oriented task in which failure to achieve climax constitutes a problem, or signals under-performance. However, the fact that sex can be satisfying for men without orgasm drives home the fact that sex that's exploratory, communicative and experimental, rather than goal-oriented, can be just as great as sex with an explosive orgasm at the end. Even better, goal-less sex tends to take the pressure off the female to perform by climaxing, the reduction of that psychological stress can sometimes make it easier for her to come. Either way, goal-less sex gives both parties more freedom to experience non-climactic pleasure, which often teaches people much more about their own arousal and erotic makeup than just straight-up fucking. Orgasm is not king, it's just a nice side effect.
Second, it also suggests men are not the soulless ejaculation robots we sometimes perceive them to be. Dudes need more than a lukewarm hole and tenuous certainty she's not his cousin to get off, and the sheer fact that they're having sex doesn't mean it's satisfying. We need to give men more credit for need intellectual or emotional intimacy to attain arousal.
Study authors Lea Seguin from Université du Québec à Montréal and Robin Milhausen from the University of Guelph, said, "When orgasm is simulated because the sex is not satisfying, or because the partner is not desired, men can be encouraged to explore ways to enhance pleasure in sex, or to communicate with their partners about activities which they find arousing and satisfying."
Yep, use your words, people.
And dudes, if you can't get off, you can fake it, but it never hurts to explain to your partner why. Although, come to think of it, "You look like a psychedelic hose beast" is a little harsh …
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