Denver just got Kendrick Lamared out of the top spot …
The Internet loves its lists. It can’t function without them. “You there! Here’s a stack of random things, organize them arbitrarily in ways you feel is most relatable to the common millennial and by god make sure it’s shareable!”
Which actually isn’t all that terrible. Especially when your city (or at least part of it) ends up on one that people can semi-brag about. But Thrillist writers may need to get their eyes checked. Recently it published “The 14 Sexiest Neighborhoods in America, Ranked” — and we’ll be damned if The Highlands in North Denver didn’t make an appearance. Not a very great one, however.
There’s nothing to suggest that this is in any way a scientific study or based off of anything more than dorm-room voodoo and Googling witchcraftery — because we’ve been to a lot of these cities and anything in California generally gets knocked far down any “hot list” because of its residents' overuse of plastics and botox. They’re like fucking aliens out there. And Miami? If your thing is obnoxious blowhards with a debilitating cocaine habit then by all means, have at 'em.
Number 11 our asses …
Here’s what the site had to say about The Highlands:
“In America's fittest state, sexy means being in shape. So one might not expect a neighborhood whose biggest draws are a donut shop and a brewery to grace a list of 'sexy.' But the Highlands' abundance of cool places to consume calories has made it a big draw for people who also enjoy burning them off. When denizens wash down a Habit donut with something delicious from Denver Beer Co., it's typically as a reward after a morning hike/run/rock climb, and it's what makes this neighborhood sexy in a way only Colorado can be.”
Here's the full “Sexiest Neighborhoods” list, with the best clearly being Kendrick Lamared out of the real prize:
14. Back Bay – Boston, MA
13. 14th St – Washington, DC
12. Buckhead – Atlana, GA
11. The Highlands – Denver, CO
10. SoHo – New York, NY
9. Brickell – Miami, FL
8. South Tampa – Tampa, FL
7. River North – Chicago, IL
6. South Congress – Austin, TX
5. The Gulch – Nashville, TN
4. Uptown – Dallas, TX
3. Balboa Peninsula – Newport Beach, CA
2. South Bay – Los Angeles, CA
1. South Beach – Miami, FL
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