These two totally just used this maneuver while boning, and look how happy they are.

Most of those "11 New Sex Tricks to Try Tonight!" articles are either completely boring, pointless, require a two-foot donger, superhuman strength or flexibility, or just plain suck. 

When it comes to bumping uglies, we want something simple, where one or both parties are lying down, expending the least amount of energy for the maximum amount of pleasure. Preferably with Netflix going within viewing distance, because we've really been on a "Friends" kick recently and damn, that's a great show. 

Anyway, instead of the usual, reliable positions of missionary, doggie, and cowgirl, it's about time you added a new one in the mix: the halfway scissor of love. 

There's probably a real name for it (and an Indian name, because it's probably in the Kama Sutra somewhere near the back), but we'll call it that for now because we said so.

Step 1

After everybody is good and warmed up (with the properly lubricated instruments), have your lady lie on her side and raise her leg.

Like this, but nekkid — and without the bored look in her eyes (hopefully).

Step 2

Straddle her bottom leg with a knee on each side of her pelvis, then gently insert your love rod into her honey hole. 

 

Step 3

Then, bring her raised leg up and over your head, and lay it down next to you, so she's in kind of an "army crawl" position, lying sideways on the bed, but with your willy inside. 

Kinda like this, but flop her leg down, draping it over your thigh. 

Step 4

If you did it right, her hoo-hoo button should rub against your thigh meat, providing extra good times. Also, there's a butt to slap, bouncing boobies to look at, and no one is expending too much energy. Just pump away!

So give this little baby a spin tonight, and we're sure you'll have a good time.