In what humanity is calling "The Greatest Crime of the Year," an Australian teen robbed a 7-11 while wielding a chainsaw and wearing a flower pot on his head in an attempt to disguise his identity. And won't believe what he took from the store.

In what humanity is calling "The Greatest Crime of the Year," an Australian teen robbed a 7-11 while wielding a chainsaw and wearing a flower pot on his head in an attempt to disguise his identity.

But it's not cash he wanted. It was a soda. The kid just wanted one fizzy, refreshing soda.

The teen, Steven Frank Steep, was arrested after he lunged at the employees and damaged a window, several display racks, and a parked car with the chainsaw. He also flashed his butt.

After the attack, the flower pot and the chainsaw were found in a nearby bush, and Steven was found strutting his stuff down the street from the bush, probably basking in the glory of his stolen sugar water. He was drunk as shit at the time of the crime, but you know what they say, you're always your true self when you're fucked up. And when your true self is someone who destroys a 7-11 with chainsaw for a soda, you should apply to Rooster Magazine. Welcome, Steven, welcome.