It hurts so good.

Life sucks, and then you die.

Nowhere is this grim realization more evident than in the human Cheeto that is Guy Fieri.

But there's something compelling in that iced-out Hawaiian shirt poppa; something we just can't stop watching.

Let's get psychological here about it for a sec: sometimes, you just want to pile more shit on top of your existing shit to enhance your own self-destruction. It's like when life gives you lemons, but you don't have any fucking water or sugar to make lemonade, so instead, you use those lemons as garnish on a Flavortown Hoo-Wee! Teriyaki Skewer courtesy of Guy Fieri's most recent cookbook, just because a small, evil part of you likes to watch the world burn.

For those times, there's this video of Guy Fieri eating to Johnny Cash's "Hurt." Trust us, watching the Flavor Mayor chow down to a song about self-harm hurts just as much as Johnny Cash hurts in the song, but it hurts so good.

Of course, "Hurt" was originally written and performed by Nine Inch Nails, not Johnny Cash, but the crushing fact that most Americans think Johnny wrote the song only serves to fuel the fire of self-implosion. 

Thanks, Internet!