news

News Briefs

Fortnite Hopes to Allow Players to Watch TikTok While Gaming, Further Destroying Humanity’s Dopamine Systems

News Briefs

Colorado Lawmaker Leaves Loaded Handgun in Capitol Bathroom, Breaking the Number One Rule in the Game of Battleshits

News Briefs

50 Women Trapped in Bus For 23 Hours on I70, Proving that “Lord of the Flies” only Works With Dudes

News Briefs

Massachusetts Could Outlaw Attaching Guns to Robots as Our Roomba Continues to Feel The Pull of a Higher Calling

News Briefs

Fire on the Mountain, Lasers in the Air