Samantha, 22, has an impregnation fetish, which puts her in a pretty tough spot.

“Nothing turns me on more than the idea of getting pregnant,” she tells Rooster Magazine. “But I don’t want a baby at all.”

Samantha is pretty open about her confusing kink. She’s an active member of online communities where people with impregnation fetishes gather. On Reddit’s r/KnockMeUp and r/breeding, users share erotic content and discuss their infatuation with fertilization.

On the subreddits, this content comes in a lot of different forms. There’s creampies: cumshots inside a woman’s vagina. There’s pregnancy risk sex: where a storyline relies on no one touching contraception. And there’s lactation and pregnancy fetish: which worship big, round bellies and boobies that ooze breastmilk.

KnockMeUp summarizes its focus as “all the consequences of fucking bareback and raw.” Samantha has worked hard to make this little corner of the Internet a welcoming space, particularly for female fetishists.

Men sometimes get turned on by the risk of pregnancy, too. But it’s women who struggle most with the ugly assumptions surrounding impregnation fetishes.

For example, that these women binge on entirely unprotected sex, then gobble down Plan B like Cookie Monster. Or that they lie about being on the pill to men who don’t want to be fathers. Or because they refuse to use a condom, they’re a genital herpes outbreak waiting to happen.

“Before anyone gets it twisted, I want to set the record straight," she says. "I don’t take part in those unhealthy things, and I don’t recommend actually taking the risks if you can’t bear the cost of abortion or pregnancy.”

Samantha says she is on birth control. She has a boyfriend, so she’s not sleeping around and risking the spread of STDs, either.

However, her boyfriend doesn’t know about her fetish. To get off, Samantha has to fantasize they’re both trying to get her pregnant. For his own reasons, he loves finishing inside her. It’s a win-win, as long as her boyfriend doesn’t find out and freak out about her kink.

Samantha’s hesitation to tell him comes from horror stories she’s heard on Reddit forums.

“A lot of men immediately suspect ulterior motives," she says. "It’s hard for them to understand you might like to fantasize about getting pregnant but have zero intention or desire to start a family.”

It’s true, sexual fantasies are often not a reflection of what we want in real life. As a prime example, ladies love porn with violence against women. “Forced,” “rape” and “gangbang” are some of women’s most popular search terms, but that doesn’t mean a woman would ever truly want a dozen sweaty dicks pounding all of her orifices.

For ladies with an impregnation kink, an IUD or birth control pills can keep their fetish contained as role-playing fantasy, rather than a liability to have an unwelcome creature take root in their womb and start sapping up nutrients.

It’s not easy being kinky, but online communities of like-minded deviants (like Samantha) let kinksters know they’re not alone.