We haven’t read them all – so we could be wrong when we say this – but we’re almost certain that there isn’t a mission statement in the world that justifies hallucinogenic drug use on the job. “Maintaining professional excellence and customer satisfaction while on boomers,” is one thing that’s likely not etched on any decorative plaque – and probably won't be for any foreseeable future.

And to that, we feel for you. Not only are you stuck inside of those blasted barricades they consider walls, but you’re presumably sober. And since we here at The Rooster care, here’s a completely natural way to get a little Woo-Hoo and shit while counting the clock. The following video asks that you read a set of letters aloud for almost two minutes, so do yourself a favor and find solace or at the very least put the phone up to your ear to make it look like you’re doing something while you’re invariably doing nothing.

You’re welcome, cherished readers.